The weight of a secret - Joon Gurung

 “Hey, can I tell you a secret?”….

I wish I had told him to keep it to himself, or just tell him to stop

talking. The burden I had to carry knowing what he did, and knowing

how it ruined her, ate me up alive.

Nico and I had always been the best of friends ever since we met in 1 st

grade. We did everything together, and when I say everything, I mean

everything, from going to football practice together, gaming all night

long, staying up having deep conversations, I sometimes wonder what

we didn’t do together. But oh here comes 10 th grade, the grade I had

dreaded but was also excited to be in. Talk about having to study

seriously for your boards but also trying to enjoy whatever time you

have left with your friends, oh boy was I struggling. But that’s not the

point im trying to talk about.

Since my school was kind of well-known to produce students gaining

high grades, there were many transfer students joining us. Some who

looked really nice, and the others who already were giving me the

creeps. I always meet up with Nico at the cafeteria who used to

somehow always be busy trying to flirt with… anyone… literally

anyone, even the lunch lady…Nico was just on a different level. But

then one day I see him laughing around with those “Cool Kids”. You

know, I wasn’t hurt by the fact that he didn’t come sit with me during

lunch, instead what hurt me the most was when he ignored me when I

came up to him. Oh well that’s how it is I guess,.. and then “BOO!”,

Nico scared the crap out of me, “hey, please don’t get angry at me, I

was just tryna make sure that you wont be seen to them as an

“Interest”, I have already been caught up by them so there’s no going

back for me.., im sorry.” Hearing that I brushed it off with no thought

in mind, it continued… and sooner or later I found out all the things

he had been doing with them… the “Cool Kids” thing.

Yes, it did hurt me seeing him like that but I couldn’t do anything… I

wish I had stopped him when I still had time. On the last day of

school, I stayed after class to just take in all those memories… and as

such cliché movies, Nico was sitting under the tree staring off into a

blank space. Instinctively I walked up to him asking what was wrong.

He just sat there in silence, until he said “Hey, can I tell you a

secret?”. The air was dense, I told him to go on… then he said “I was

the one who lead Cleo to her death”, … Cleo was a sweet person who

I would occasionally meet in the hallways, who had been on a trip for

over a week.. so why was he telling me that he lead Cleo to her

death?... “I broke her, the others told me that she was nothing but a

homewrecker… destroying a perfect family. So I did what everyone

used to do to her, I backed her up into a corner and destroyed her

stupid phone. I didn’t realize what I had done back then.. I destroyed

the one thing she had left of Her broken family… later she was found

by her mother… hanging above the ceiling..” I ran away.. I ran far far

away from Nico… I ran away from the Truth he told me…

I haven’t seen Nico after that, I don’t know if he’s still with his “Cool

friends”, or if he’s doing time in jail, or if he’s just trying to live a

normal life… trying to forget about that incident. Honestly I wished I

had done things differently… maybe if I had stood up with Nico,

maybe he wouldn’t have been friends with a bunch like that…and

that incident would never have occurred. I still cant bear the weight of

a secret my dear best friend said to me.

Im really sorry Nico

From your loving friend,

Leonel